"quality time"

I made some sort of ridiculous attempt of spending some quality time with my kids. Rick went fishing with his brother for the night, so I thought a nice evening with my kids would be therapeutic for us all. I started with a gourmet meal at Burger King, followed by the play pit and milk shakes. After ten minutes they were hanging out with me at the table, and that we can do at home without the faint smell of urine and shrieking unmanageable children whose parents use Burger king play places as day care centers. So we went home, thinking we can snuggle on the couch with some popcorn and watch a movie together. Silly me. Silly, silly, naive, me. Dare I hope for such a pleasant evening? We piled on the couch and "it" began. He's touching me, she hates me, he's on my blanket, he's ruining my life, Kaylin's a stupid head, and so on and so forth. I think you get the picture. Kaylin wanted this, Brandon that, let's watch this, no I wanna watch that, I wanna sit by momma, no, I do. Then the tween that had once been my sweet little girl starts screaming how it's not fair and Brandon is ruining his life and she just wants a normal family and no one respects her. She storms off into her room with an attitude I'd just LOVE to smack off her face. Can you give an almost 11 year old Midol? That pretty much ended the evening. Brandon melted down at that point, which I can't blame him for. He went to his room since suddenly I had become a "bitch ass". I slumped off into my room, with the door open, to read and hoping everyone just needed to chill for a few. Kaylin came in maybe 7 minutes later. Announcing that I was rude for not telling her good night. I told her to sit so we can talk and I tried, I really tried to talk to her. But she just argued with me, I tried to listen, sympathize, settle the match. She wasn't having it. At that point I told her how it was. Straight to the point, holding nothing back. During my rant she got up and walked out. Brandon had fallen asleep already. I lay on my bed shaking my head and trying to figure out were my good intentions went. Kaylin skulked back in and sat on my bed pouting. I asked if she wanted to talk, and she didn't. I think she wanted to reach out to me, to let it all out-what she was holding in, and to apologize (can blame a girl for hoping). She hugged me and I held her and told her I loved her. I don't feel like it was good enough, I feel guilty, like I'm totally missing something with her. I don't know how to help her, without her giving just a little for me to work with. I know it's got to be hard for her dealing with a brother like Brandon. But at the same time, somethings gotta give. You have to be part of the big picture, be part of the change. I can't get her to see that it's my job to turn her into a some what productive member of society, and responsible, caring adult. Anyway, that was my night....